I really didn’t know any different.
I was 7 years old. And really had just fallen in love with baseball and the Chicago Cubs. I could have named the starting lineup with position on the field and in the lineup.
I remember laying in the hallway on Sunday afternoons watching the WGN broadcast instead of napping. I can still hear the fumbling, mumbling singing of Harry Carey of “Jody – Jody Davis”.
I thought it was always supposed to be this way. No one had told me about 1908 or 1945 or 1969 or anything about a Billie Goat. What I learned on October 6th, 1984 was a lesson in history and heartbreak.
The Cubs were up in the series 2 games to 1. Game tied in the 9th at 5-5. The most domiant closer in the game Lee Smith was pitching. Shut the door, lights out, score a run and let’s go to the World Series.
And there over the 370 sign in right field in the 9th inning at Jack Murphy Stadium I learned my first lesson in heartbreak. His name was Steve Garvey.
Heartbreak happens.
At 7 years old heartbreak heals fast. Or so I thought. But at 39 and the Cubs as good as they have been in 100 years, I still hate Steve Garvey.
A text from my dad the other night reveals everything you need to know about this type of heartbreak. After the Cubs looked sharp in Game 1 of 2016 Divisional Series against the Dodgers he simply said “there is a lot of series left”.
Deep heartbreak has a way of building guard walls that allow a sense of anticipation with a large dose of reservations. Once a heart is broken it is hard to trust that it won’t happen again. Case in point the Steve Bartman game of 2003.
Heart break extends past the baseball diamond that sits on the corner of Waveland and Sheffield. Heartbreak hits at home field on every corner of every town. Heartbreak happens.
But heartbreak should never prevent us from believing in the impossible. I am not putting the divine on the baseball diamond, but being a Cubs fan does require a great dose of faith. It requires the belief that what I have never seen with my eyes is possible — a World Series. In much the same way that is faith in God. It is trusting in an unseen God to do the things I have never seen before. It is trusting though my heart has been broken before it won’t keep getting broken.
While I still may need counseling over 1984, I am die-hard that this is next year. And while my heart outside of the Northside ball club has been broken even more in life, my God has shown himself able to be more faithful than Ardolis Chapman fastball.
The psalmist wrote: The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18
While 2016 may result in more baseball heartbreak, I have a God that is near. And belief that he still does the impossible.
If Steve Garvey ever reads this, I forgive you.
#justbeingjeff
Despite their best efforts Cubs win 2016 World Series. I now have peace.
