One of the number one things I’ve taken grief for in my life is being an only child. People always have something to say when they discover this fact.
“Oh, that explains so much.”
“Really? Well, I guess I can see that.”
“Huh. You don’t really act like an only child.”
I’ve gotten all of those responses and more. Well, I’m sure that my being an only child has formed a lot of my thinking and even probably explains why I think or feel about things how I do. I was not an only child by my parents’ choice. My mother would have had a houseful had she been able. But God saw fit to just give them me. I always liked to think they reached perfection with the first go-round, so why try anymore, but they saw it differently. My parents, more than once, have referenced my birth as a miracle. They had been married for 10 years when I was born. Doctors had said it probably wouldn’t happen. They had started the adoption process. But God thought differently.
So, here I am as an only child, raising 5, (yes, 5) children with my husband. There is so much I don’t understand. First, the rules of shotgun. I just don’t get the specialness of the front seat. Or gosh, with our kids the passenger side back seat. They call “dibs” on everything. It’s been quite the learning curve having more than 1 child. I wouldn’t trade the lessons for anything.
Another lesson came at basketball last night. Our family is blended. A “yours and mine” situation, we say there will be no “ours”, but in truth, they’re all ours. The girls were watching the youngest brother play basketball. My daughter’s half-sister (her dad’s daughter) sat with us. Our good friend’s boys also sat with us to cheer on their brother and my son. The youngest of those boys is the most delightful of boys you’ll ever meet. Caden accepts and loves without question. He has come to refer to my son, Matthew as one of his “brudders”. As I sat there the thought came to me, in our very imperfect family structure sits this perfect mosaic of what God sees in us. He views all believers like Caden views Matthew, just another one of the “brudders”.
Granted, there are no half-siblings, step-siblings, or family friends in the family of God. And as a wise woman once said, God doesn’t have any grandchildren either. However, no matter how we came to our salvation experience- as a child, a teenager, an adult, or an older adult, God views us the same. It doesn’t matter if you have this amazing testimony of how God saved you from the depths of sin or how he kept you since you were a child, we are all the same. Accepted. Loved. Called his own. He values each one of us.
I sometimes struggle with the family of God, not always understanding how that dynamic is supposed to work. You know, since I’m an only child. However, the more I see my kids interact and grow, the more I understand.
Are your “brudders” (or sisters) doing something worth cheering on? Then, cheer them on.
Do they need some encouragement? Encourage them.
Do they need accountability? Step in.
Do they need discipleship? Help them.
Thankfully, as a part of the family of God, I’m no longer an only child. I’ve got lots of “brudders” and sisters to celebrate with and to mourn with, to encourage, to be encouraged by, and all the things that families do. It’s really a great thing to be a part of this family.
