As was often the case, our personal dinner table would be the discipling space for many of these young adults. One Monday night, it would be no different.
A young man who had come to Lee to study Youth Ministry had found his way to our church through an invitation from a friend. Word of mouth was our greatest marketing strategy. While the easy presumption is that if you attend a Pentecostal, Spirit-Empowered university you have some background or familiarity of that expression. That assumption would be wrong, even for School of Theology and Ministry students.
In the midst of a series we titled “Ghosted” from the book of Acts, I was teaching on the power of Holy Spirit baptism and the evidence not just of speaking in tongues, but the evidence of being an empowered witness as Jesus outlined in Acts 1. This young youth ministry major who had a non-denominational background responded to the message that night for prayer.
We did what we always did. We prayed. We laid hands on him and asked God to fill him and make him a witness empowered by the Spirit.
For my Pentecostal and Charismatic friends reading, this is where you expect the story to turn to the usual suspects of modern Pentecost – falling out, tongues, shouting, spinning – all the things that show up on Tik Tok and IG reels.
It was a quiet, but powerful moment. There was little fanfare. No shouting in tongues, no overly exuberant praise, not much indication of anything other than the weightiness of the Spirit in the moment.
Now back to our table. The next night we had this young dating couple over for dinner. This young man’s girlfriend said “tell them. Tell them what happened.”
This Youth Ministry student simply said “something happened.” Unsure of how to explain what it was, he just described it as a weight, a presence. My simple response was “that was the Holy Spirit.”
This became kind of a norm for us. God moving mightily in the minutia, not the show.
What we learned over the course of three years was the young Millennials and Gen Z want Holy over Hype. Now don’t miss it, there are those who still love the shout, the praise dance, and some flag waving. That just was not really us or how God moved in our house.
It was very counter to the culture of a very Pentecostal community our church was planted in. It was unique. In fact, one congregant described it this way, “you cannot come to The Collectives and not expect to be a participant.” Due to our size, there was no place to hide.
“You cannot come to The Collectives and not expect to participate.”
Understand, I am not taking shots at larger churches or churches that have highly expressive praise. Yet, I am saying it is easy to hide in the noise. For many young adults, they know that on the swell of the bridge they raise their hands. They understand the youth group rush to the front of the stage praise dance session. What was new for so many of them was the weight of God’s glory. It was new when Heaven descended into the room and instead of a response of shout, it was to sit. Instead of a loud worship, it was weeping.
We repeated over and over a value: Authenticity Is Essential. The goal was to be authentic, always. I know that sounds redundant, yet it is unique in our culture. Rachael and I were bent on being the same person on Sunday on stage as we were Tuesday at Cleveland Coffee & Market. Here is what happened: Authenticity invited vulnerability and that was critical. When we stressed authenticity it opened the door for young adults and adults alike to bring their whole selves to the altar. No need to hide in shame. No need to shroud their situation with poetic Christianese. No. Authenticity was an open door to bring your mess to the Lord, to the altar, and at times to our table.
Authenticity was the value that crafted Couch Conversations. One young man shared his gut wrenching, life changing story of how God rescued him from a life of homosexuality while over for dinner. I looked at Rachael and said “we have to share his story. It will change lives.”
So we did in a Q&A interview style on a Sunday night in place of a sermon. And God moved. Why? Because over all the hype of church, God is calling us to be Holy. Holy requires a broken vulnerability and an authenticity. You can hide in the hype. It is hard to hide in the heavy holy.
Authenticity was and is essential.
